I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
