Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
That accounts for only three of the penises
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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