used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
