Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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