I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
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