There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
