I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
