And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
