Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
