All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
