it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
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