What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
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