I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
