I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
