I swear god or herbie drove my car home
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
