I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
