I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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