I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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