Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
