My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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