ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
