Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
