No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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