brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize