It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Randomize
