I don't think brook has ever known best
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
