it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
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