the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
