How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
