i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
