He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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