it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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