Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
