Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
