weddingsv make me drug and hornr
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize