Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
