I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
