sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
one two three fourrrrnication!
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
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