Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
