Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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