is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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