Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
