its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Randomize
