not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize