Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
