did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize
