OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
