i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Randomize
