I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize