apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
