You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Randomize
