I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
My pussy is not your playground.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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