i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
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